"Here, try this," I said to my friend Kelly, sticking a glass of creamy mystery liquid under his nose.
"He's going to need more information," said his girlfriend Tara. "You can't just offer that to a straight guy."
Once I explained it was hemp milk he was more willing, announcing that the dairy and soy alternative had a "hint of Maalox."
"Plus an essence of sawdust," added my Emergency Contact, the Long Suffering Floyd.
It's true. It's the first beverage I've ever imbibed that tasted of rope.
Tara took one sip and cringed, asking, "People really drink this?"
"On a dare," replied Kelly.