So I'm in the grocery store and I see this guy in a Blazer jersey, or what I like to think of as a Blazer blouse. The blouse says "7 Roy" and--now that I'm a sports fan, I know that it refers to Brandon Roy, who scored the winning shot in the final .8 seconds in overtime.
Which motivated me to walk up to this guy and utter a sentence that has never once passed my lips: "That was some game last night, huh?"
That's right, I actually talked sports. What's more, I can't stop. Suddenly I have something to discuss with heterosexual men. It's so liberating. No wonder straight guys do it. No need to discuss your feelings or your appearance or how your empty life is a massive disappointment to you. You can simply focus on the superhuman achievement of others, relishing their success as if it were your own.