I know, it's been over a month. Actually, more like a year, as I've been a reluctant blogger for all of 2009. I think what happened is that I burned out from posting daily in 2008, so I spent the first half of 2009 in the cave working on a new book, rewarding myself with a month-long adventure in LA. At that point I thought, now I'll start posting more regularly.
Then my mother coughed up blood.
I spent the next five months either caring for her and helping her prepare to die, dedicating whatever time I could find to write. The whole experience felt too private and painful to share online, so I pretty much opted out of the virtual world. I've been pretty absent from the real one, as well. I consider myself very blessed that she and I had the time together to finish her life and have been blown away by what a transformational experience it's been. It's a seismic shift, one that has already divided my life into before and after.
My mother passed away peacefully at home on November 15th. Her bravery in facing death was heroic.
I'm still reorienting myself and hope to share more of my life here in the future. I've discovered I'm not the kind of person who wants to document his every move, but I do value making a connection with others online, so I'm striving for some balance in the coming year.
Yours,
Marco
Monday, December 7, 2009
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10 comments:
Peace, Marco. This sounds like what I had in 2005, my mom died the day before my 46th birthday.
This is definitely a transformation from before but "after" is still in the future, from my experience, about 18 months for the "after" to really begin.
Treat yourself with extra care and savor all friends.
It's been years since my mother died and I even after all this time, I understand the pain of loss and the gift of being with her.
Blessings on you, my friend. Cry when you need to, and be at peace when you can.
I'm so very sorry to hear that. Do what you need to. We'll be ready to read when you're ready to post.
Thanks for the news. Love from your friends here in Chico.
Sorry to hear about your mom. It's good that you had the chance to spend a lot of time with her toward the end.
Last week I took my own mother to Holidazed. She loved it and is now raving about it all over town.
So sorry to hear about your loss.
Hey Marc,
So sorry that you have joined the shittiest of clubs (the dead parent club). I know what you mean about Before and After.
Take good care of yourself and even better, let others take care of you too.
All condolences, Marc. Been there, done that and I wish no one to ever have to go through the death of a parent. Much love to you and yours as you move through this difficult time.
Marc
I just want to send you a big hug.
You were lucky with your mother.
Many parents try to spare their children the pain of their last days in life. Your mother was very generous, letting you be with her at the end, and helping her die.
Now, what is left for you, is to remember her, to be happy, and to go on making her proud.
Love
María
Thank you all for your thoughts and prayers. Your kindness touches me.
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